Hot Water

Some of my colleagues at work decided to go to a nearby fast food place to buy lunch. As a kindness to me, the only foreigner in the office, they chose a Western restaurant to grab a sandwich and drink to bring back. (Now, those of you who have lived in China for a while know where I'm going with this one. The rest of you, keep reading.)

It took almost 20 minutes before I got the phone call: the only sandwiches available were the ones with the spicy meat. And there was no Coca-Cola, just water, fruit juice and tea. OK, I said. Just get me the spicy sandwich and I'll douse the burning sensation with the fruit juice.

So by the time the crew returns to the office, I am so hungry I could eat my way through the Great Wall. But beyond that, I am unbelieveably thirsty. "Sorry it took so long," one of my co-workers apologized. "The sandwich might be cold by now." "Mei wen ti," I responded. "No problem." I ignored the sandwich and went straight for the fruit juice...which happened to be heated to a temperature close to that of Starbucks' hottest latte.

"WHAT THE #@&!?" I exclaimed, spewing the drink back into the cup. "This $#%#" is boiling!"
"Of course," my workmates explained. "Hot drinks are good for your health. Everyone knows this."

But not freakin' orange juice, I replied. I expected it to be warm, but this was like Satan's citrus revenge. It was Anita Bryant's worst nightmare come true.

After researching the facts, it turned out that my co-workers were correct. When they ordered the drink, they asked for fruit juice "without ice," which apparently meant "crazy hot." And hot water is truly necessary in China, not only because it's favored for tea, but also it guards against impurities that come with contaminated water. Years of environmental neglect combined with rapid industrial development has left much of the tap water in Beijing unfit to consume. So it's boiled, bottled, and sometimes served at high temperature. The complimentary glass of water which you receive upon being seated at a traditional restaurant in Beijing is typically steaming.

The ultimate irony came when I finally bit into the food, which was indeed as chilled as the Harbin winter festival. It just goes to show you how China sometimes resembles an upside-down world: the sandwiches show up cold, but the drinks are hot.